Feb 24

A Note on Fear

Franklin D Roosevelt in his iconic inaugural address profoundly claimed that we have nothing to fear, except fear itself.  I think any business owner or anyone who has dabbled in a creative industry might disagree with that statement.  Fear is all around us and it’s scary.

My friend Ciarra with Silver Fox Calligraphy has a skill share project focusing on the community and bond that we self-taught artists have.  It’s a way to learn from one another, confide and realize that we’re not alone, especially in our fears.  I’ve happily lent my voice to the project.

In her most recent post, she challenged us to think back to the hurdles that stopped our creative journeys.  Without hesitation, fear was my first response.  We often focus on how worried we are to take the leap.  But for me, I was practically shoved off the cliff.  I had stood at the edge and looked longingly at dreamy future on the other side.  However, standing is all I ever did.  It was a daydream.

I’ve been reminiscing, trying to figure out how I actually overcame my fear.  And the truth is, I haven’t.  I’m still scared every day that maybe I won’t book enough weddings or maybe my next centerpiece won’t be shop stopping.  Perhaps I will order the wrong number of flowers or a bride won’t like her bouquet.  What if other vendors don’t like the way I coordinate something?  The voices and the fear are never ending.  I think the real challenge is learning how to just push it to the back of your mind and not let it be the main focus of your life.

So as far as being shoved off the cliff, my journey as a business owner started when I found myself with a poorly timed pregnancy and was no longer able to work at my full time job.  As I sat on the couch pregnant and unemployed, I had two options.  I could sit there and wallow in my own self-pity, wondering why no one would hire me to do my dream job.  Or I could create my own dream job.  I settled on the second option.  But I’m not 100% sure I would have ever started this venture had I not been put into that tricky situation.

Fear | The Day's Design | Kelly Sweet Photography

Photography: Kelly Sweet Photography

I’m going to leave you with these thoughts to ponder over the weekend – you’re in control of your own success and failures.  And just because you fail at one thing, doesn’t mean that it won’t help you succeed with another.  True life confession, I have knots in my stomach right at this very moment so worried that my next project I’m working on might not live up to its fullest potential.  Perhaps I can’t control every detail, but I can control my reaction and keep a handle on my own fear, always pushing forward.

The above picture is another example of my attempting to overcome fears with this artful session with Kelly Sweet Photography.  She’s amazing and made me feel and look like a goddess, rather than a frumpy mother of two.  I won’t be sharing the entire session because… well… it’s not all G rated (it’s for someone special’s eyes only) but it was a great reminded of what a powerful, sensual woman I can be.  And I think we all need to remember what’s awesome about ourselves every now and then.

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